Should a family go into debt for funerals?
Nowadays, in our villages, a reality challenges us more and more: funerals become a silent competition. Everyone wants to “do more”, “do better”, sometimes at the cost of enormous sacrifices… to the point of falling into heavy debts.
But let’s ask ourselves a simple, honest question: How does a grand funeral really change the value of the person we’ve lost? How does this further ease the pain of loved ones? The dignity of a human being is measured neither by the number of tarpaulins, nor by the abundance of meals, nor by the noise of the entertainment.
Today, some go into debt to bury their loved ones, simply so as not to “be frowned upon”. However, going into debt to save a life, to care for a parent, to invest in education or in a project for the future – it makes sense. But is going into debt to impress at a funeral really reasonable?
This drift has several serious consequences:
– It puts already fragile families in lasting financial difficulties
– It maintains unnecessary and sometimes cruel social pressure
– It diverts the very meaning of funerals, which should be a moment of contemplation, respect and solidarity
– It creates a false hierarchy between the dead, as if some deserved more honor than others
Let us honor our deceased sincerely, not excessively. Respect is not shouted, it is lived in simplicity, in dignity and in the love that we have for those who leave us.
Everyone must act according to their means, without shame or comparison. Let us refuse this collective pressure that pushes us to do more than is reasonable. A strong community protects its members, not one that pushes them into debt for appearances.
Let’s get back to the basics: solidarity, compassion, and authentic respect for our traditions — without excesses, without competition.
True tribute is not measured in expenses.
Dr. DJIMELI Marlyse
Educational psychologist/ Sociologist
